i find it harder and harder to connect with someone, anyone.
this is unusual, for i don't usually have problems with connecting with people. i know i've had the practice "not needing anyone, for that matter", but needing people emotionally is vastly different from needing people in other areas, because you need "the other people" to be around so you can earn their money.
it seems like i'm rather brutally practical about things, whether or not i can take it. if i need it, i will take it. "survivor" is just another word for "rat", i've found: it's near impossible to eradicate this species.
maybe it's professional fatigue that causes me to speak like this, maybe it's physical - hell, maybe both.
it feels good now that i have people there for me. i'm thankful for it... the only shame is that the boyfriend's not there.
i must be without a soul to feel this way!
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