deliberations

i've wondered, sometimes, how some people can write about anything and it turns out beautifully worded.

it enthralls, makes you read on, page by page. easy reading.


and sometimes, when i read those, i get jealous. how can they write something provocative about crossing one's fingers and turning on one's temperamental computer, hoping to the heavens above that it will be in a good mood?

what did they do, read, see to think and talk like that?

HOW did they even WANT to talk like that? it seems pretty pre-programmed into our brains that we speak how we speak wtihout even thinking about it, without the plan to deliciously mislead, confuse and waylay presumptious thoughts.


so how do i elicit 'how clever!'s from people reading my works?

reinventing oneself, reinventing how i speak how i communicate how i look at the world which MUST be if not refreshingly then vastly different from anyone else's thoughts.

maybe that's how writers come to be 'eccentric'. maybe it's just harder to understand because you didn't manage to catch the nuances that the other person caught.

sometimes people have 'moodswings' because something you hadn't noticed affected them. might be something you had said, might have been something he/she saw.

he/she might have hated purple-coloured cars because he's had a nasty uncle who owned a purplish pick-up. and now that he's rich and famous (or not) he's developed an intense dislike for all things purple. and maybe when he's happily chatting with you the waiter served you two ice-cream in purple glass cups.

and suddenly he doesn't like ice-cream anymore.


..it's not he doesn't like ice-cream, it is not evne the cup that he doesn't like.

it's the (ctrl-i)colour(ctrl-i) that he doesn't like. capisce?


and poor you, you probably didn't even know because he never said.

moodswings. bah. whomever coined that term probably hasn't heard of minute-detail-affected-ism.

..alright so there's no such thing. but you know what i'm talking about.


the best thing to ask when someone's having 'moodswings' (-schmoodschwings) is probably 'what's wrong'?